Monday, October 22, 2007

A jumble of things....

Well, the school year is in full swing, but Brandon is off to a great start.  Almost two months in and I am wearing down though.  I've been the full time parent for six years now.  It is pretty much the same every year.  After a couple of months, my son and I get pretty tired of each other.  Even though this year I pretty much had the whole summer to myself and crammed in everything I could, I am starting to wear down again.  I am working hard to keep from getting where I was in the spring though.  I have changed my work schedule this year to be home when Brandon gets out of school.  Now he can play with the neighborhood kids in the afternoons and evenings.  He does his homework, gets a snack, and goes out to play for a couple of hours.  I get some time to get things done around the house, make dinner, etc.  Brandon and I are also playing various sports.  He does soccer, and I am doing volleyball, kickball, and softball.  I also have three babysitters to call on, though I don't do it enough!  I also have an amazing girlfriend that lets me vent and offers up a lot of encouragement and support.  I just do not really get a lot of pure adult time where I do not have to be responsible for anyone and can really just let loose.  My job is extremely demanding during the eight hours I am there each day.  Getting to and from work is  pretty mentally demanding as well.  To get anywhere around here you need to cross a bridge or a tunnel, or a bunch of them.  Traffic is just tremendously tedious.  At home I'm trying to stay one step ahead of a ten year old boy that pushes every button and limit far beyond the acceptable.  Plus, I never really know what report from either school or day care awaits me.  Most of the time the conversations with those institutions start with "Mr. Dad, can you come into the office so we can talk about Brandon."  Any energy, spirit, or hope totally drains out of me at those words, and I hear them a lot.  I have had to take my son to several different doctors, emergency rooms, etc in the last two weeks.  He was bitten by a spider, had a bacterial infection, multiple emergency room and family doctor visits for the bite, normal counseling appointments, plastic surgeon for the spider bite (family doctor was being overly cautious), and a new psychiatrist (praise God).  My medical insurance at work has changed and I am in the process of just getting my own insurance.  It is actually cheaper than the NEW High Deductible Health Plan.  You see, a single parent of a special needs child is the worst case scenario for this new insurance.  GRRRRRRRR.  There is the constant threat of vomiting when my son takes his evening and morning meds as he shoves the offending pill down his throat, halfway to his stomach.  I don't know why, because when he throws them up, I rinse them off and hand them back.  Ok, not really....well, once, but it was the anti-biotic and he needed the full regimen of that.  Hey, I had to pick through the vomit to get it....

Enough griping though....on to other things....

Two Saturdays ago was the Pub Crawl that benefited Parkinson's disease.  I got a babysitter and had a plan.  I don't drink often...if ever.  Many of my friends don't know that I drink.  It isn't that it is a secret, I just don't do it often.  You see, I am a single parent and I normally have my son with me.  I don't take him where there are a lot of adults drinking, and I don't drink around him otherwise.  We had a great time and it was for a great cause.  I also found some great new German pubs that I did not know about before.  :-) 

Two Sundays ago we (my son, my girlfriend, and I) went to Church, did a few hours of rock climbing, had a social at California Pizza Kitchen, and then played a couple of hours of volleyball with my league.  OMG, Who knew Volleyball could be so much work?????  Twenty some years of playing basketball has been a huge disadvantage to me.  Volleyball is nothing like basketball and I'm unlearning a lot of things.  I really like the exercise and I am learning to like the game.

Last Wednesday we had an awesome kickball game.  We won a game!!!!!  And not by forfeit!  Susan, my girlfriend was the MVP of the game.  She has several outstanding plays and kicks.  For once everything just came together.

My son has been playing soccer with the YMCA.  He loves it and is learning to love running.  This past Saturday he nearly kicked a goal in from half field!  In the air no less!

This past Saturday was also the Wine Festival.  Unfortunately, I only got to some sweet reds and whites, but they were good.  I love Chianti, Cabernet, and most of the other reds.  Susan and I had two groups to meet up with, and I forgot about the third (which I hope they forgive me for).  Susan and I ended the night with buffalo chicken sandwiches and friends at Hooters. 

So in all, I have made an effort the past two weeks to get out and get some Mike time...and give Brandon a break from mean ol' Dad.  It has been a difficult two weeks with work and doctors so I really needed the breaks.

Halloween parties coming up this week.  :-)

Have a great week everyone!!!!

PS: Transformers is a kick ass movie. If you haven't seen it, you should! There is one scene where they talk about masturbation so if you have children that will ask, you should know...

"Until you forget what you think you know and what you think is possible, you will never know what is truly attainable."


  1. This is a great blog! I don't often get to hear the perspective of a single dad.

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  2. I enjoyed talking with you the other night. I haven't laughed that hard in a long time. At least not sober!

  3. As a fellow single dad with a special needs son (he's 15 with ADHD), I feel your pain. The words "This is the assistant principal, and we have your son in the office" pierce me like a sword. I'm also in Va. Beach.

    Your posts are inspiring to me, only because I thought I was the only one in town! Feel free to e-mail me anytime that you feel the same way. I have gone round and round with my son since taking him on as a foster child four years ago, and have actually made some headway.

    I do miss "adult" time, but figure I'm only a couple of years away from having more of that than I ever dreamed of.


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