Wednesday, May 30, 2007

You have to know who you are dealing with....

What kind of deception is a 10 year old boy capable of? Just about every kind. They get caught too. Which surprises them every time. There really is nothing new under the sun, but they think so.

The phone call from the school nurse goes something like:
NURSE: "Your son is falling asleep in my office."
ME: "OK."
NURSE: "He says he took too much medicine this morning. Now he cannot stay awake in class. He is falling out of his chair in my office."
ME: "OK. Well, he did not have too much medicine this morning. It has to be something else." {here I wrack my brain to think of what it could be....nothing comes to mind} "I can't think of what though. He had a good weekend, the medicine did change, but he hasn't had any problems with it though."
NURSE: "Well, I'm going to let him lay down. He'll be here when you pick him up."
ME: "OK." {Damn it. Why can't he just take a nap and stay at school? He is up to something, but what? I cannot afford to take a day off from work either. Damn it!}

So, I get to the school and pick the boy up. I take him home, let him sleep. I check in about 11am, still sleeping. However, I see something under the bed and instantly I know what happened. He turned the sound off on his gameboy and played it all night last night, at least until the batteries died. Now, I want to wake him up and really let him have it! But, I wait. He gets up on his own a little while later. I ask him for the gameboy. He gives it to me. He is about to say that is not why he is tired, but my look stops him in his tracks. He does admit that he did play it the previous night.

I just let it go and do not say anything else.

After a little while he comes in and asks what he is supposed to do. I tell him the leaves in the back yard need to be raked. Thus begins the four hour dance of every five minutes having him walk in, asking if he is done, me telling him no, him pouting, going back out, occasionally slamming the door, raking, and includes one and a half major temper tantrums. The half being the steam build up for the full one. After what seems to me to be a veritable eternity, he finally almost has done a good enough job. He was attacked by ants. Brown recluse spiders and Black Widows loomed menacingly, but never seen. Poisonous snakes were slithering all about, but he couldn't quite see them. (actually, I was hoping to find a couple but none were out there). A broken bird egg was a sure sign of trouble. In the end of an adventure that would rival Indiana Jones, and certainly four hours equals two movies worth, it was finished. Leaves raked, patios swept, and we were still able to make it out to kids night at the Silver Diner so I could talk with some adults, eat a great salad, and he could play with some other children. {SIGH} Anyone want this job?



  1. That's some pretty tricky stuff right there. Because I see a version of this in my future, I'm so filing away your methods on rectifying it!

  2. Since I was the queen of stunts like that, I'd say I will be experiencing my fair share in the future. Kudos to you for keeping your cool.

  3. Ha! I'm assuming you didn't recharge the battery for tonight?

  4. fdkg: I wouldn't say it is rectified, more like mollified for the moment. If it were ever going to be rectified, it would have been when I took the gameboy away for a year. A whole year. :-) He absorbs anything and patiently waits for another opportunity to wreak havoc on his poor dad. :-)

    It is so hard sometimes, especially when I lay the options out so plainly and he stubbornly refuses all of them. He knows it is the wrong thing to do, but he can't wait to do it anyway. :-)

    Nope, he lost his indoor charger, so all he has is the car one. He definitely won't get it back until Saturday, and only for an hour at that. Sunday, after his time with it, it gets locked up again until next week. The 14th of June, he goes to his mom's for the summer.

    Anyone have a time machine?


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